Scene IV. Washington, D.C. the Capitol.

[Enter Carl Albert and divers Senators and Representatives.]
Albert. My Democratic friends, hearken. Listen
carefully to what I shall say.
Things, my friends, have gotten out of hand.
This scandal, called Watergate, has brought forth
fifty criminal indictments, a dozen 5
pleas of guilty, an entire Cabinet
swept away, and a Vice President
fallen from office, forgotten and alone.
1st Senator. ‘Tis as if we should celebrate.
2nd Senator. Aye, ‘tis a joyous news for we Democrats. 10
The Party Republican is damaged
beyond all recall and repair.
1st Represent But, methinks, sometimes, this carnage has been too harsh.
Albert. Though, we at first encouraged the undoing
of this scandal, for sometime it has gone 15
forward without our help.
3rd Senator. As if some monster, created and
controlled by mad science’s hand,
nursed and weaned , now has grown to such a weight
it rolls on, uncontrolled by helpless science 20
unable to stop its course or change its destiny.
2nd Represent Aye, these matters have wound into even
some corrupt practices of a few Democrats.
Albert. These are all but mere minor incidents
on the grand scale of Watergate. What have 25
we done, but set in motion a machine
of destruction, given momentum to the machine,
until now it crashes down the hill
faster than we can even watch?
Into whom it will crash, only God knows. 30
3rd Senator. Let us, then, withdraw to the sidelines and
watch the momentum of Watergate.
If we step in now, we shall be charged with
guiding the investigations. Let us
withdraw, and quietly, to watch the path 35
this monster machine sweeps out.
[Exeunt all save Albert.]
Albert. I shan’t wish to be a Republican right now.
[Enter Gerald Ford, as Vice President.]
Hello, there, Jerry.
Ford. Hello, Carl. Why do you wander these
empty halls, so sad and melancholy? 40
Albert. I suppose I shouldn’t be. By all the great
prognosticators, we should have a great
landslide for my party in the elections
this coming dull November.
Ford. I don’t think many Republicans stand a chance. 45
Albert. Aye, not only this Watergate, but
inflation. It looks bad for you, indeed.
Ford. ‘Tis true, especially on the inflation.
Tough times are tough on incumbents
of the party in power. 50
Albert. There are many men of high learning
within this Congress, Republicans by trade,
who say if the President should resign
then the Republican Party would
do much better this Fall. 55
Ford. I don’t want to be President. I don’t
need to be Vice President. I think the
case of Richard M. Nixon is near its close.
The facts will come out and for better or worse
the facts will be known. I pray the 60
President will be vindicated.
[Exeunt.]